Weekend Marriage

Today, I woke up with a headache and it is now 4:30 pm. The headache has not gone away yet, so I am glad that I opted to stay home and "recover." Meanwhile, I was able to get most of my recent "for sale" items packaged up and outta here before Suk finds out that I sold or gave away a bunch of dvds and videos that we don't need and will never ever watch again. I think he just likes to keep them for posterity even if most of them were given to him for free from his company and they are B-rated movies. Let others enjoy them...and then pass them on.

So, since I was at home today, I decided to watch a little TV. I very rarely turn on our TV these day, except when the Olympics was on. One reason is simply that the reception sucks in this building, and I hate watching three of everything. The other reason is that I don't find Japanese TV all that fascinating anymore.

I happened to turn it on to a drama - one of those syndicated ones that are on in the late afternoons. The name of it was Shuumatsukon. This means "weekend marriage." It is exactly what you think it is. A married couple who only see each other on the weekends because the guy works so late every night, and in some cases he has his own apartment near his company where he stays during the week.

Let me just say that if I had known there was even a term for this situation, I would NOT have opted to get married and move here. Suk sold himself to me by saying that it wouldn't be this way forever. Other people have told me it only gets worse. And, I read in the newspaper last week, that with the baby boomers starting to retire, the divorce rate is going up. They have this new term called "Narita Divorce." This is akin to the Honeymoon Divorce.

A "Narita Divorce" is when a couple who have not spent much time together due to the husband's working schedule plan a trip to a foreign country to celebrate his retirement, and when they get back to Japan, they file for a divorce because they realize that spending that much time together is not what it is cracked up to be. The article also warned that going on a luxury cruise is the worst idea for a couple like this because being stuck together on a cruise ship for weeks tends to cause even more divorces. In this case, the woman usually has an easy time attending social activities and making new friends on board, while the man holes himself up in the room and pouts.

The article suggests that you take short trips and weekend trips together for a while before going on a long vacation.

This is the latest news in my career as a married woman. My husband told me he had to ask my advice about something. He said that he may have a chance to take a business to L.A. to do some editing work on a trailer for a movie. I know that this is his dream, but he was worried that the business trip might end up being in March, right around or ON our moving date.

Oh my god - if he leaves me here alone during our moving date, I am sure that arrangements will me made so that his family will help with everything. Scenes from the MOVING WEEKEND FROM HELL flash through my mind!

After a moment, I looked at him and said, "I know it is your dream to go to L.A., but what is your priority here? We have been planning this move for a year now."

I know he understood what I meant. I hope he gets the opportunity to go, but his company always has such great timing! They love to spring things on him at the worst times, and guess what?! They DO NOT CARE one way or another if it has any effect on his family...I mean, his wife.

Customer Service my AASS

In January, I wrote a 3-page letter to American Airlines complaining about our problems with them on our flight home to Japan. Surprisingly, I got a response by email:

Given that you have contacted us again, I wish there were some way to resolve this issue to your satisfaction and in accordance with our company policies and procedures as they relate to this matter. While I absolutely understand the point you are making, I'm afraid our position has not changed. We must decline to settle this issue as you have suggested. We are simply making no exceptions to our corporate policy as it relates to this situation.


This was my response, also by email:
And you call yourself a customer service department? You can't even write an authentic response to a complaint? Your email makes no reference to my complaint nor to exactly what you are refusing to in dealing with the issue. Does everyone get a letter like this? I suggested that you improve your customer service in the future! You refuse to do that?! Have you ever been in a customer's position for any situation? You are human, right? Do you realize what you are telling me? That you have a corporate policy of offering only the worst customer service possible and that you WILL NOT do anything to improve it. Thank you for being honest.


This is why they advise you not to respond to emails when you are pi-i-i-issed.

Update

Olympics:
I am bound and determined NOT to miss tonight's skating event, so I am going to not depend on the VCR timer. Last time, I set the damn thing to start recording at 3 AM and when I woke up in the morning, there was NOTHING! I am so disappointed in missing everything I want to see. It seems like curling is always on at the right time when everyone in Japan is awake. Great planning, folks!!! We LOVE that curling.

MIL:
Haven't interacted with her since our last dramatic episode, but her name has come several times in arguments between me and Suk.
What do you have against my mom?
Why do you hate her?
What did she ever do to you?
You're just jealous of our relationship, aren't you?

Let's get this straight, buster, I do NOT hate your mom. I just want a little LESS of her and a little MORE of you!

He thinks I should make the first move and call her up to apologize or something like that. For, like, a minute, it crossed my mind to send her some flowers with a letter about how we are under a tremendous amount of stress lately and it is affecting our relationship - so sorry to have let it interfere with our precious MIL-DIL relationship. But, I decided that from a Japanese perspective, that might sound like a big, fat excuse. So, I chose to do nothing, for now.

Car:
Since Suk got his license last December, he is now keen on buying a car and can be spotted scouring brochures and car magazines in what little free time he has. He and his MOM and dad went car shopping one day when I was out of town. (Yeah, I was real happy about that, but I got over it. I told him to take some cars for a test drive with the salesmen, because that is what one would normally do when purchasing a car, but he is afraid to drive. I guess he'll have to bring his dad and let him do the test driving. Hmmm.

Condo:
We are moving to our new place at the end of March, and I am anxiously waiting to pack up all our stuff. The boxes will be arriving from the moving company this week. I have not been successful in convincing Suk to go through his stuff and purge a few things. I tell him we can't possibly fit everything into our new place. One thing I really hate is clutter, and for those of you who are familiar with Japanese people, they LOVE LOVE LOVE clutter. But, when I mention the topic, he becomes very violent and mean. He refuses to part with anything, and he is quick to point out all of my things that could be thrown out.

So, I took it upon myself to throw out some things I had been on the fence about, but was afraid he might get offended.

A small stuffed teddy bear given to me by Suk's dad for no reason whatsoever.
Justification #1: I hate stuffed animals.
Justification #2: Suk refuses to touch anything that is dusty. He considers all stuffed animals to be dusty the moment the plastic wrap is removed. (Note: this does not stop him from collecting various toys and stuffed animals, none of which he will touch, but he displays them proudly in our entrance area)
Justification #3: It has no special meaning to me. Not like the little stuffed sheep my mom gave me when I was a teenager and I still have.

A HUGE stuffed teddy bear given to me by Suk's dad for no reason whatsoever.
Justification #1: I hate stuffed animals, especially ones that take up a lot of room.
Justification #2: At first, I admit that I liked the thing because it made for a soft pillow while watching TV, but then it was considered "dusty" and therefore "untouchable" by Suk within one week of receiving it. I wasn't allowed to move it around because that would "stir up dust." It has been biding its time in the storage room ever since.
Justification #3: If I throw it out now, he will never even remember that it existed.

The bottom of our kotatsu blanket set
Justification #1: It is hard to clean, it bunches up and it is a PAIN IN THE ASS.
Justification #2: The kotatsu set is ugly. I did not choose it. I hate flowery things and for the longest time, I was sure that MIL had chosen the curtains and all other fluffy objects for our apartment before I moved here, because they all have one thing in common - BIG UGLY FLOWERS in COLORS I WOULDN'T WISH ON MY WORST ENEMY.
Justification #3: Somehow I convinced Suk to buy a hot carpet, so after we move, we will no longer need the bottom kotatsu thing.
Justification #4: As soon as the weather warms up, or as soon as we move, that top kotatsu blanket will get thrown out as well. Good riddance!

SUMMER VACATION:
Originally, I was planning to go home this summer to see my parent's new house, to go through some of my stored items, and to see some friends whom I could not visit with last time around. Then, the whole lack-money-thing got in the way. Our finances are stretched slightly thin this year, and I am afraid to leave the dog for such long time while it is still young and being trained. I don't want some idiot to come along and screw him up, so I best stay in Japan and spend my vacation with Max.

Now I am trying to convince Shannon to come and visit. We didn't get much alone time together this past Christmas, and every once in a while, I go through major Shannon-withdrawal. Other than her (if she agrees to this), I don't think anyone else is coming to visit this year.

Feminine is the New Masculine

I have decided that this should be Japan's new motto.

Watching Takahashi this morning doing his Free Skate routine, I asked Suk, "What do you think of him?"

I expected an answer like, "He usually skates better than this. He must be feeling really nervous."

Instead, I got, "I think he's gay."

Actually, he does not look gay in Japan. He looks like a very typical, fashionable man who spends a lot of time on his hair and clothes. This is the recent trend of young Japanese men.

Some of my male students wear barrettes in their hair, long purple and fushia scarves around their necks, earrings, and pink cardigans under their school blazer. This is as much as they can get away with while wearing a school uniform.

I have even seen boys sporting headbands - the kind that a girl would traditionally wear to hold her bangs back.

Although, I want to make snide remarks to these boys and demand that they remove their accessories for the class, I do NOT. I wouldn't want to damage their self-esteem.

Before Saying Goodnight

Tonight, I actually sat down and watched the digest version of the Olympics, and I got to see a tiny bit of skating. Japan has only one male skater - Takahashi. But I don't care, I just love watching the figure skating events no matter who is up there. Give my sister credit for that one. I also managed to find out that skating will be on TV from 2:30 am to 7:15, so I am going to set the VCR and tape it.

I started a new blog the other day called Puppy Love Love. I didn't want to inundate this blog with stories about Max, so I thought I would dedicate a blog to dogs and call it a day. It is very much a work-in-progress as I want to write about some dog-related events over the past year, so most of my entries are still in the drafting phase and have not been published. I also need to learn a few more tricks about HTML and blogging before I let it out of the cage, so to speak.

By the way, in a class today, a student asked me what "so to speak" means, and I had NO IDEA what to tell her. What the hell?

I never write about my students for privacy's sake, but I have noticed something really strange about my female students lately. When I call on them to answer a question and they don't know the answer, they look at me with these cute, childish puppy-dog eyes. These are high school girls. I am not sure why they think I will take it easy on them if they do that, but perhaps they are just beginning to discover their potential as women.

I mean, don't even try to tell me that you never ever look at your boyfriend or husband with those big puppy-dog eyes when you want something, and he knows you want it, and you know that whatever it is, he will give it to you because how can he NOT!

Now that everyone is ... happy

Last fall, my friend Sara got engaged to her awesome live-in boyfriend. He is very much like a boy we all had a crush on when we were kids, so I consider her to be pretty lucky. They'll get married this September in Wisconsin. A small wedding as neither one of them are religious. I would so like to attend this wedding, but due to my school schedule, I doubt it will possible. I haven't made a final decision on that front though.

Last night, my best friend Shannon got engaged to her boyfriend Russell. I wrote about them in a previous entry. She forewarned me the day before by sending me an email. She said if he were to propose, she would call my cell phone immediately. I made sure to charge up my cell phone this morning before leaving for work, but unfortunately, I forgot it at home. I stopped at home on my way to my Japanese lesson, and there was a frantic message on the cell phone, along with another one on the house phone. She is engaged! I am hoping to get more details soon.

Last weekend, I got my postcard in the mail saying that I passed the 2-kyuu exam for Japanese proficiency. Yeah for me!

Tonight, like Chris, I played cupid and introduced my Australian classmate from Japanese lessons to a very good Japanese friend of mine. Let's call her Ms M. Ms M brought along one of our other friends for moral support, and this was a good thing because it gave Ms M many chances to chat away with him while I chatted with Asako. Oh, in actuality, he could have his choice of either girl. They are both great candidates, in my opinion. Everything was going well. The conversation was comfortable, they were duly impressed with his knowledge of tax-related vocabulary in Japanese (God only knows why we were talking about taxes in Japanese!) and the two of them seemed to get along nicely. Until...

Towards the end of the evening, over dessert, I decided to drop the bombshell - the news about my new puppy. I even had photos to show off. I happen to know that my Australian classmate loves dogs as much as I do, and that he can't wait until he moves back to Australia so he can get his own. Ms M took the photos from me and looked them over. She said, "It's nice for you, but I'm not interested in this myself."

When questioned further, she said, "You see, I just don't like living things."

Ouch. That bites the big one.

I am not sure how he will feel about her after this. I wish I had known this small, but very important detail about her.

She doesn't even like goldfish.

And now...the good news!

Since last July, Suk and I have been discussing mundane things like breeds, gender, color and house-training. In August, I wrote in my blog about going to visit a breeder in Nagoya. We had been hoping to get a dog from her when the time came, but the time came and she seems to have fallen off the face of the earth.

As our moving date grows near, our search for a reputable breeder has become more serious. We were discussing our schedule for this year and about when would be the best time to introduce a new puppy into our lives.

Turns out that April 1 will be the best time. It is one week after we move, so I will have to work hard to organize the house before we bring him home.

Yesterday, after arguing a bit, as usual, we did our regular internet search to see if any pups had been put up for sale lately. We had decided to try for a breeder in our same prefecture, so that we could actually go visit the breeder and the pups without having access to a car.

We found what we were looking for and after some emails were sent back and forth between us and the breeders, they invited us over to come and see the puppies. There were three left, and based on the photos from the net, we couldn't decide which one we wanted. They told us if we wait too long, the puppies will be sold to other people. So, we took the train up to their house late last night.

We felt kind of nervous on our way there, but I had prepared the cash just in case we would decide to buy on the spot. All three of the puppies were boys, so whether we would get a boy or a girl seemed irrelevant now. We were getting a boy, for sure.

When we arrived at the place, it was quite dark and hard to see, but it was your typical Japanese family-owned business - very messy. They took us to a small building just off the main house where guests can come and look at the puppies, and this room was clean and cozy. They brought in the three little guys and we all sat on the floor playing with them for a while.

It was so hard to decide because they were all very playful and healthy-looking, but somehow I liked the one that had the most white on his face. He has a small black mark, shaped like an eyebrow, over his right eye, and that is what did it for me. He seemed to take a liking to me as well, and once that was decided, we paid the money in full.

Since we cannot keep pets at our current place, even in secret because the apartment manager lives just below us, we asked the breeders to keep him until April 1. On April 1, we will go and pick him and bring him back to his new home.

We have already chosen a name for him, and the breeder is going to call him that so he gets used to it. Also, they want us to go and visit him sometimes, so we can play with him and get him more used to us. Meanwhile, she is going to keep us up to date with emails and photos about him.

This is a very exciting endeavor for me and in many ways, it's a dream come true. I hope, but I cannot expect, that it will help Suk and I to not fight like cats and dogs anymore. Maybe it will bring some peace to our household - something else to focus our attention on rather than each other's annoying habits and negative traits. I can just hope for that.

Introducing...Max!

My Enemy

The other night, we had a date to go over and eat "The Last Supper" with Suk's sister and the family because from now on, as a married woman, she may not come home as often and if she does, she'll be bring Sensei with her.

This is the story of that night, but alas...there is a happy ending, which I will write about in my next post.

On the way there, Suk turns to me and says, "Do you feel that my mother is competition for you?"

I told him the truth. Although I think she is a wonderful, nice and funny woman, I sometimes feel the situation is difficult to deal with. Not only does he suffer immensely from what we commonly refer to as Oedipus Complex (or Mazakon in Japanese), his mother is quite proud of the fact that her son likes her and depends on her so much.

He went on to explain to me that there is a difference between "love for you mother" and "love for your wife." Oh, yes, do I need that explained to me? Does anyone? God, I hope not.

What has always bothered me is that he often makes arrangements with his mother and sister before speaking to me about it. I am usually the last to know. It is as if I am on a need-to-know basis, and most of it seems to be stuff I don't "need to know," according to them.

In the beginning, it usually involved dinner plans. Plans would be made, times, places and food would be decided. All week, they would call each other using cell phones (not once would our house phone ring!), and finally, the day before the decided date (and sometimes on the day of!), I would be told about my weekend plans.

There were times when I already had my own plans. Or I just wanted to hang out with my workaholic husband on the weekend because that is essentially our only time together. But basically, I just wanted to be let in on the planning stages, so that I could be more informed.

After arguing about it for a while, we (I) came to the conclusion that since I am the wife, I should have first priority in his life, and that decisions should not be made without me, even if it is something as harmless as a Saturday night dinner.

There are other issues involving my relationship with Suk's mom, but this seems to be the main one.

When I first started this blog, I wrote about how we chose to buy our condo. We will move into it next month, so the last few months have been very busy making arrangements for a moving company, signing papers, choosing and ordering furniture, etc. Unfortunately, there are some things which I cannot do by myself, either because the condo-related stuff is not in my name, or because I am not completely literate in Japanese.

Nonetheless, I do my best to stay involved in the entire process...

Which is really hard when you have a husband who much prefers to depend on his mom for everything, and she enables him to do so.

For example, we have hired a moving company. A consultant came to our house to estimate how much the cost would be. My husband is a workaholic, so I have to do all the purging, cleaning and packing by myself. Suk made the arrangements with our current apartment manager as to when we have to be out of our apartment. Mind you, we are moving to a place just down the street (a 4-minute walk), so the ideal thing would be that we have an extra day or two to go back the old place and clean it up a bit before handing over the keys. Without consulting me (as usual), Suk arranged to hand over the keys on the SAME DAY that we move. Good-bye security deposit x 3!

When I complained, he assured me it would be okay because his entire family (including Sensei!) would be coming over to help us on that day. I thought that could be a good thing or a bad thing. Do I really want his mom taking over everything in the new place in her "helpful" way? Do I really want her cleaning up after us? But, with so little time, you do what you have to do.

(Not so! His family objected to the idea of cleaning up our old apartment while we assist the movers in our new place. THEY also want to be in the new place "assisting." Yeah, I can just see it now.

Me: Please put the table over there.
Her: No, it should go here. Yoo-hoo, put it here.
Him: Actually, I am thinking this would be a better place. What do you think, Mom?

Or

Him: Mande, why don't you stay here and clean the apartment.
Me: Why do I have to?
Him: Because my mom can make coffee or tea for the movers, and that's an easy job for her.
Her: (says nothing
Me: I can do THAT!!!
Him: It's just BETTER FOR YOU TO CLEAN!!! FINE! YOU DON'T WANT TO MOVE?! LET'S JUST CANCEL THIS WHOLE THING!

The end.)

So, back to the latest Saturday night dinner at her house. First things first, I had been low-carbing it last week due to a slight weight-gain and was surprised to see what she had prepared for dinner.



Ha! And they say Japanese food is healthy!

Second, I hadn't been feeling good all day and had an upset stomach. I knew that alcohol and deep-fried food would be a bad combination, but I couldn't refuse to partake. Halfway through dinner, I had to retire to the sofa where I could rest quietly.

After dinner and dessert were finished, Suk took his folders pertaining to our condo out of his bag and prepared to show her various pieces of new information and possiby ask for advice. Most of this is stuff he hasn't even bothered to explain to me. When I pick something up and ask a question about it, he usually yells at me and says, "Jibun de yome yo!", meaning, "Read it yourself!" Yeah, that's likely.

One of the items he brought with him was a magazine about dogs. We are in the process of looking for a breeder of French Bull dogs in our area of Japan, and I think he just wanted to show her some magazine articles about this type of dog. I was only half paying attention to their conversation.

She was basically lecturing him about how it's time for him to grow up and become an adult. We are almost 30 years old. We are buying a condo, getting a dog and thinking about starting a family. So, we should be able to do things on our own by now, and we should follow the proper Japanese customs of gift-giving and so on. I was totally with her up until the "gift-giving" part because I just don't get that. I have had problems with it before, and I don't want to be caught in another endless cycle of "This gift is really boring, but here take it," followed by "Thanks for the gift you gave me last week. It was wonderful. Here is a really boring gift for you in return," followed by another "Thank you so much for that gift you gave me. I made this for you. It's not so good, but take it," and so on and so forth. This kind of cycle tends to last forever, and all the while, you are left thinking, "A true friend wouldn't expect gifts from me every time I see her." So, if he wants to give gifts to people, that is fine with me, but I don't want to get involved with that. In any case, the first part of her lecture to Suk had a lot of truth to it even if it was embarrassing for me witness my almost 30-year-old husband getting talked to in that way. I kept my mouth shut.

After a while, Suk changed the subject and showed her the dog magazine. She started talking about whether we should get the dog neutered or not. Of course, she claimed it was unnecessary and that the only reason Japanese people do it is to keep their dog from barking, which would annoy the neighbors. I couldn't help but speak up at this point.

Of course, Suk agreed with her. I told her my reasons for getting a dog neutered or spayed, but I also let her know that I had already decided it. A lively, but not fun, argument incurred between the three of us, with SIL throwing in her two-cents, "Well, you'll be making your dog into a new-half!" Thanks, SIL, that really helps.

The argument finally ended when I told Suk's mom that she has no business giving us advice about such a thing because it something between me and Suk, and because she has never owned a dog. So, there.

Suk didn't like the fact that I yelled at his mom. I didn't like the fact that Suk always takes her side. The mood changed at that point，and of course，it was all my fault for being an opinionated American, and I went back to putting all of my concentration on the Olympics on TV.

Finally, it was time to go home. I stood at the door with my shoes on waiting for Suk to gather his stuff together. She came to door and in her most gracious voice, she said, "Iro iro arigatou gozaimashita," as she bowed deeply.

Could you get any more sarcastic than that?

Birds of a Feather or Something Like That

Last week, we had yet another family tragedy on my husband's side. I never realized how truly melo-dramatic they are until my SIL announced she was getting married. Now, another tragedy has occurred.

My mother-in-law's pet bird ran away...I mean,it flew away.

We gave her that bird as a birthday present last summer. She had been wanting one ever since their last one died about 10 years ago. It's a yellow cockatiel. She gave it the same name as the last one - Okame-chan, which basically means "Mr. Cockatiel."

Last week, I got a frantic phone call from my husband saying, "I have something really shocking to tell you, are you sitting down?"

I thought, "Oh god, now what?!"

"Okame-chan flew away. He's gone! My mom is so upset about this."

I know that pets are really important to people, and if my (future) dog ever runs away, I will be engulfed in guilt and sadness. However, I couldn't help but feel a little bit "unconcerned" in this situation.

Suk said she felt guilty because we are technically the owners of this bird. I quickly corrected him and reminded him that Okame-chan was, in fact, a gift to her and that she is now the owner. I suggested we buy her another bird, but that this time we should go with the much cheaper model - the $15 kind of bird that can actually learn to talk. (Being that always lament over the fact that Okame-chan will never be able to talk, this seemed like a good solution to me.)

He doesn't like this idea, and since he suffers from a serious case of Oedipus Complex (aka mazakon), he wants to rush out and buy her a new bird exactly like Okame-chan.

Meanwhile, the abrasive sister-in-law's reaction to the whole thing went something like this, "You idiot! You might as well just dive off the balcony and kill yourself."

I do think that is going a bit far, and if I am concerned about anything in this situation, it would have to be Mother-in-Law's psychological state after hearing something so horrible come out of her own daughter's mouth.

Can buying a replacement bird pull her out of this depression?

Shouldn't we tell her to buy it herself, rather than take it out of our own savings? Isn't that what you would do when a child loses his hamster?

I know that option would not go over well with Suk because he is such a Mama's boy. He thinks he should pay her back all the money she spent on his college education. But, that is a story for a another entry though!

Obvious News

I guess it's obvious, but I changed the template of my blog yesterday. No worries, I just did it because Christine advised me to change it to something that is easier to work with. I wanted to add links to other web sites and to my favorite blogs, but I am not literate in HTML, so I wasn't sure how to do it. Now, with my new template, it will be easier to set up the links in the right column.

Also, isn't this template much easier to read? I think so!

Tomorrow, I am going to Tokyo to hang out with my friend Andrea at her house. We're going to do scrapbooking together. Then, I am heading over to Louise's house where we will also do scrapbooking, followed by dinner out, karaoke and then staying up all night gabbing. Louise has three kids and is a working mom, but we started this tradition last year, so every January, I am supposed to do an overnight at her house on the west side of Tokyo. Suk is not too happy, but he'll have to deal. I know he just misses me like crazy because he doesn't get to hang out with me during the week. That is so not my fault though!

Also, I decided to start calling him Suk (pronounced "sook"). It is short for Yusuke (as in YuSUKe). I began calling him that soon after we got married as a cute little newlywed nickname, but I don't really make it public. I just thought that it would easier when referring to him in my blog and in my scrapbooks because it is better than typing "my husband" every time I want to write about him.

Mande's J-Life Stands for Life in Japan...Get it!?

Last night, I reluctantly went back to my Japanese school and signed the contract for the next round of 60 lessons. I so did not want to do this, and I definitely did not want to hand over an envelope filled with cash (105,000 yen or $1200) to that receptionist/teacher, whatever she is.

While sitting at the desk waiting for her to count my cash and find out where they keep the change (they have so few students who take classes there, I was surprised they even HAD change!), I happened to notice some free "Take One" magazines sitting there. I picked up a few issues of Metropolis. That's a weird magazine if there ever was one, but it's nice to find out exactly which bands are coming to Japan and then lament over the fact that there is no way I could get tickets for them since A. I don't know how to get tickets and B. it's always too late by the time I find out. Since I enjoy that crummy feeling, I grabbed a few issues just to skim them.

Then, I noticed another magazine with the extremely creative title J-Life. And, I was like, "Hey, they totally copied me!" Here I thought I was being so original in choosing the title of my blog. I chose "Mande" - because that is what my friends, family, husband and anyone who knew me before 2001 call me. Everyone who met me since 2001 calls me "Amanda" because that is how I introduce myself now...yeah, now that I am a grown-up married woman, I thought I should be more formal. Also, I decided the name "Amanda" sounds better with my new last name. So, I thought if anyone were to google my blog (not that people really do this), my friends back home would have an easy time finding me, but people that I have met since 2001, would not. As this blog was originally meant for those old friends back home, I used that logic to use Mande in my title. Although, at this point, I would be happy if anyone was reading this.

Then, I thought, oh, if I put "Japan" in the title, the blog would be TOO easy to find. So, I came up with J-Life on a whim, and I actually assumed that no one had ever thought of that before. Right. By the looks of this magazine cover, they printed their first issue sometime last fall, so they totally DID copy me. As if.

If you are just the least bit curious, you can find this magazine and try reading it. I have not (and probably WILL NOT) read it, but there are contributions and advertisements geared towards people from all sorts of cultures who are now residing in Japan, and they are all written in Japanese with little furigana characters above the kanji. If you didn't understand that last sentence, then you probably need to start by taking Japanese 101 at your local community college.